On Being Naked
ON BEING NAKED :-
SHAME SHAME PUPPY SHAME !!
SHAME SHAME PUPPY SHAME !!
The chants still reverberate in my ears. I was 4 years old and it was my first foray into school. I was enrolled at Reubs Babyland Nursery school which was a pre school to which my parents enrolled me in. Prior to that my entire socialization hinged on my parents who doted me and my playmates who also doted me – after all I had the ‘magical power’ of being able to put little sticks in my long hair and making it stay. Needless to say I enjoyed the ‘hero’ status amongst my small audience. Even back then I had fun entertaining people. Now that I think about it that IS why I have grown my hair . As a backup plan if I start bombing on stage.
(The picture to the side IS me as a kid naked with my uncle - I was two).
Prior to going to school I had no concept of the fact that taking off your clothes might not be a good thing unless nature says so. I had no concept of ‘societal rules’ . The only laws I knew were the ones that nature enforces like if you sit on a nail your ass hurts , if you slap a monkey it WILL slap you back and dogs don’t like if you try to climb on their backs using their long wiggly ears . You know things like that.
My parents decided to put me to pre school mainly to give a rest to my mom who was tired of cleaning up after me. My first day of school was incidentless except for the fact that I kept on looking through the window and saw my father’s face there – parents were allowed to stand at the window to see how their precious ones were doing – kinda like a training school for puppies except two legs instead of four. It was on my second day that I did something that changed me for a long time. I really don’t remember why I did it but I took ALL OF MY CLOTHES OFF during class. I just felt like it I suppose. There were no ants in my pants, no need to go su-su (Indian or atleast Gujarati for pee pee) no discernible reason at all. Just did it like a future burner should and almost instantaneously I had all the people look at me in shock and disbelief. Other kids in the class were kinda stupefied. I guess they were all well taught as to why NOT to take their clothes off.
This is the first time I remember the feeling of something being wrong and not knowing what it was. I thought maybe they did not know how to take their clothes off. Idiots. That is when the laughter and the hands on the face thing began. A lot of the kids started putting their hands on their faces to depict the ‘felt’ shame. Then the boys started chanting.
SHAME SHAME PUPPPY SHAME
SHAME SHAME PUPPPY SHAME
SHAME SHAME PUPPPY SHAME
( the second and the third p in puppy was emphasized)
Instantly I sprung into action. I ran off to the end of the classroom and stood in a King Jeremyesque pose facing the corner. My teacher came over to my side to help me dress up. She was mildly annoyed by the fact that a kid in her classroom did that but I am thankful that she clothed me. I still remember the end of her saree (‘pallu’) falling on me and comforting me.
The next day onwards it was the same chants again before class , during assembly , during recess and AFTER class. It stopped after I beat up another kid for saying that. I guess violence does have its place in the playground. I was punished for the fight by having to stand in the corner and putting the trashcan over my head. Not as in wearing the trashcan just putting it on my head as in carrying it – a standard punishment leftover from the British ‘raj’.
I never took my clothes off in public after that.
Not at the river in the village when EVERY kid swam naked. Tapan wore pants.
Not while being in the forest and having to ‘go’. Tapan exercised mind over bladder.
Not while being at the pool in the USA. Tapan wore pants AND a t shirt.
Read tomorrow for the derobing of Tapan at Flipside in Austin ,TX.
posted by THE Original Indian Comedian @ 1:24 PM
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